Save Room for Dessert
by Theoretical-Optimist
Summary: Filius and Pomona go on their first date but things go awry when an unwanted person crashes the party. Written for Round 6 of The Houses Competition. WARNING References to drug use


House: Gryffindor

Category: Themed (Disappointment vs. Pride)

Prompt: Horrible Date

Word Count: 986

Beta: Secret Fruits

-AN Papaver is a species of poppy. WARNING This story features mind altering substances being added to baked goods.

* * *

When Pomona joined the staff of Hogwarts, Filius was thrilled to have a colleague who was within a decade of his age. He remembered her from his own school days- she'd been Head Girl when he was made prefect in his fifth year. Filius always liked the way she treated all the prefects equally, regardless of house affiliation or age.

Pomona had a relaxed, laid-back attitude that Filius somewhat envied. He had been rightfully accused of being too uptight many times in his life. Many a fool had suggested that Filius had his wand shoved up his arse, but he was only too happy to correct them by brandishing it in a duel. He didn't become a Master Dueler without considerable skill after all.

At the first faculty meeting of the year, Filius was surprised when Pomona barged right through the door, plunked down in the seat next to him, and struck up a conversation. He was instantly smitten.

It took Filius nearly a year to work up the courage to ask her on a date. Although it was frowned upon for faculty members to pursue one another romantically, it was allowed so long as the staff was discreet and the students remained unaware.

Filius planned what he thought was the perfect date. Because neither professor could leave the castle on a random Thursday evening, he decorated a spare room next to the Ghoul Studies classroom. That area of the castle was usually vacant so there was little worry of their date being crashed by nosey students.

He spent the afternoon merrily arranging the room to resemble an Italian restaurant. He slid a few desks together with his wand, transfigured a handkerchief into a red and white checked tablecloth, and floated candles in the air. He charmed a violin to play softly to set the mood.

He commissioned the house-elves to prepare a special dinner of puttanesca- he'd learned Pomona loved plants in all aspects of her life. He would have asked them to make a tiramisu as well, but Pomona insisted that she would bring dessert along with her. He hoped his dessert wine choices would work with whatever she brought.

As he waited for his date to arrive, he surveyed his work. Everything was perfectly in order. He felt utterly proud of the romantic atmosphere that he had created.

A knock sounded at the door.

"Filius?"

He opened the door. "Ah, come in Pomona." He helped her to a seat at the table and started to serve the antipasto. "Thank you for doing me the great honor of dining with me this evening."

She let out a laugh. "No need to be so formal, Filius. Kick back, relax, and pour me a glass of that wine."

Following her directions and calming down a bit, Filius raised a glass to toast, "To something new!"

"I'll drink to that," she chuckled and clinked her glass against his.

From that point, the conversation flowed easily and the date was going swimmingly- at least in Filius' opinion.

That was until an unwanted intruder interrupted their interlude.

"Well what do we have here? Ickle professors making smoochy faces at each other? What will the children think? Naughty naughty!"

Filius's face turned bright red. "PEEVES! Get out of here!"

"Nope." Peeves swooped down from the ceiling and crash landed in the puttanesca. Sauce and noodles sprayed up and drenched the dining couple in a tidal wave of red. He scooped up Filius's wine glass and asked, "Mind if I have some?" before tipping the liquid into his mouth. The wine, of course, passed right through his body and soaked into the tablecloth.

Filius felt like the floor was dropped out from underneath him. What was supposed to be a lovely first date was turning into a horrendous mess thanks to the ruddy poltergeist. Now Pomona would never be interested in exploring their relationship further. He was completely devastated.

"Hey Peeves!" Pomona yelled, effectively diverting his attention from unstringing the charmed violin.

"What!?"

"I brought some lovely chocolate brownies with me. If you promise to leave us be, I'll give you the lot."

"What would I want with brownies? I can't eat 'em."

"No," Pomona admitted, "you can't eat them. But I happen to know that Caretaker Pringle loves brownies. Think of all the good fun you could have with him if you leave us alone now."

Whooping with glee, Peeves dove for the offered desserts and disappeared through the floor.

Filius' eyes widened. "That was brilliant!"

"You don't even know the half of it. Those were special brownies. I made them with a bit of papaver. It'll make old Apollyon chill out for once."

"Spe-special brownies? And you meant for us to eat them?"

"Well yes." Pomona shrugged. "I would have told you about them before I let you take a bite. It's _fine_ in small amounts."

"How will Apollyon know to only have one?"

"He won't. It won't do him any long term harm- just knock him out cold for about a day."

"Pomona!"

She giggled. Filius found that he quite liked the sound of it.

He looked around at the havoc that lay strewn about the room he had so perfectly crafted. With a disappointed sigh he said, "What do you say we just forget this horrible date ever happened?"

"Why would we do a silly thing like that? This was the most fun I've had in ages. Plus, you look pretty cute all covered in sauce." She leaned in and gave him a peck on the cheek.

His cheeks became inflamed – though it was impossible to tell through the layers of tomato. Perhaps the date hadn't been as terrible as he'd thought.


End file.
